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Dec 24

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A holiday chuckle just for you

A couple weeks ago a friend told me that she loves it when I write about the newspaper because it reminds her that some people work in offices with people they like. :-)

Well, today I have just the thing!  For the past several months, I’ve been writing down the funny things that my co-workers say.  I happen to work with an exceptionally funny and interesting group of people, so even though I’ve only been doing it for about four months, I had multiple pages of funniness recorded.

Today, as their Christmas gift, I gave everyone in the newsroom a copy of what I had collected.

Many of the quotes are only funny in context, knowing the personalities of the people involved.  But I’ve pulled out a few that I think transcend that.  I present to you the Caledonian-Record’s 2012 “Notable Quotables”.

  • “Remember Johnny Appleseed?  Well, I’m like him.  I’m Little Jimmy Joy Seeds.  I travel around spreading my Joy Seeds everywhere I go.”
  • “I’m picking up what you’re putting down.”
  • (from our publisher) “You’re all very good, but I honestly wish I had two more of me.”

Felix Baumgartner, aka Splatty Dude

  • (from our court reporter) “Melinda looks really good in handcuffs. I have to give her that.”
  • (from our K-Cup supply man) “Strong, yet smooth. Now that I’m done describing myself, let’s talk about K-Cup coffee.”
  • “I feel like if Steve Jobs can come up with the tablet, he can effectively come up with a better way to deliver babies.”
  • “A guy who’s willing to jump from 23 miles up is going to come to a splatty end sooner rather than later. He is a bug on the windshield in celestial terms.”
  • “Any conversation that begins ‘I feel’ between two dudes isn’t going anywhere.”
  • “Instead of talking about our feelings, men play fantasy sports.”
  • (on Dec. 20, the day before the Mayan Apocalypse) “Shelly, what’s the forecast for this weekend?”
    Shelly – “Fire and brimstone.”

Dearest readers, YOU are my Christmas miracle.  Thank you for your presence and your love.  I hope you have a joyous holiday.

All my love,
Leah

About the author

Leah Carey

Leah Carey is the Chief Miracle Officer of The Miracle Journal, where she writes about the large and small miracles that happen in her life every day. She is a life coach, speaker, journalist, freelance writer, and lover of life. In all of those pursuits, she works with people to identify what’s already right in your life so you can build an even more joyful and fulfilling daily experience from that foundation. You can find her on Facebook, , Twitter, and YouTube.

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